I so want to find you To lightly touch your face I will open both of my hands To gently caress your back Please let me have your Lost time Before you cry I will be the one to keep your tears Even if the world stands in front of me And wildly say That I should stop being extravagant and wasteful If I Can Love You So Episode 30 Hello? Mochi? What’s wrong? Hurry up and come here. I can’t drive the car. Hurry up Hello? Mochi? Mochi! What happened? Hello? Mochi! Kaoer, am I really just a passerby in your life? The one who loves me, the Kaoer whom I love, where did she go? Hello? – Is this Milan? – Who is this? I am Luo Hao’s building owner. I heard he did something wrong and went to prison His rent is almost over. Can you come and take care of it? I got it. I’ll go over in a few days to clean his things Didn’t I say that I’ll clean his things in a few days? Milan, what’s wrong? Yingzhi Where are you now? Is something wrong? Did you know Kaoer fainted today? Fainted? I heard Chairman saying it on the phone. He didn’t say much I heard Geng Mochi also went to Hongjiang today You’re his assistant. Do you know the overall situation? Kaoer is pregnant. How could she faint? Fainting is fainting. It’s not the end of the world Whats wrong? How could you say that? I’m in a bad mood It’s fine. Two men are watching her. What can happen? All right, I won’t say anymore. Bye-bye It’s the end of the world for me. Who cares about me? Are you Bai Kaoer’s family? Kaoer is pregnant? What is it? Are you really surprised? What kind of husband are you? Your wife has been pregnant for 3 months but you don’t know? I really didn’t know. I’ve been too busy recently No matter how busy work gets, is it more important than your wife? The baby she’s carrying is your child! You’re too irresponsible! Her pregnancy doesn’t look too good. When she wakes, she’ll need further testing Is there any danger? Are you asking about the adult or child? Both There’s nothing big with the adult She is too exhausted and is undernourished With good rest and sufficient nutrition, she’ll recover soon I checked the fetus’ heart just now. The fetus is not doing well We have to do further examinations If the baby is examined to have problems, do you plan to keep it? Of course. It’s my child. Why wouldn’t I want it? Then you take good care of her. Look for me when she’s awake Thank you, Doctor
Mochi. Did you find Kaoer yet? Mochi. You What’s wrong? Mochi You’re awake Why didn’t you tell me about your pregnancy? Sorry, Mochi. I didn’t purposely want to hide it I just didn’t think of how to tell you Take care for your body first What’s wrong? Why are you looking at me like that? The rent ends this month Either you continue renting or you move out I had to look for so many people before I contacted you I heard you are his girlfriend This matter can only be your business We’re not going to rent anymore. We’ll move in a few days All right, what about the electricity and water bills? I’ll pay it all at once All right. Then get back to work. I’m leaving Milan, I really love you Nonsense! Who would you love then? I’ll always love you. I’ll always only love you Really? – Really Luo Hao. I’m sorry I didn’t think things would turn out like this I’m sorry, Luo Hao I only hoped that my life would get better and that I would be respected I don’t understand why they are living so happily while I am living so miserably I won’t allow those days to continue on anymore Don’t worry. What other people owe me, I will return it to them a thousand, a million times back – I was just looking for you – Is there a problem? The test result is out. The fetus has a congenital heart condition Is the result accurate? If you doubt this test result, you can go to the provincial hospital to get another test, but the result will be the same That’s not what I mean It’s too shocking Hurry and do the surgery. If you stall anymore, there is a chance of miscarriage It will harm your lover’s body even more Heart illness I was right about you being irresponsible Heart illness can be inherited You knew you have a heart illness but you still let your lover get pregnant We won’t say if the heart illness is 100% inheritable, but the chances are really high Doing this is very risky Yes, we honestly did not consider it carefully Then what do we do now? Undergo surgery to abort the child? That’s right. The faster, the better What if the child is born? Let’s not talk about whether or not this child can live until birth It is a problem whether he can live after birth or not Do you know how hard it is for a pregnant woman? If she carries the baby for eight months and still cannot save it, do you know how your lover would feel?
Are you really the husband of Bed 3? I am Then who is the man by her bedside? Her cousin Cousin Uncle. Aunt Oh, it’s you Did you know that Kaoer is pregnant? She’s pregnant, but you made her attend the wake at the funeral hall How can you be so immature? I am sorry. I only just found out that she is pregnant If anything happens to Kaoer, if anything happens to the child she’s carrying, I will really Okay. Okay. Don’t shout here Let’s go now Mom! Mom! Mom! My son! My son. Why did you come back? I missed you a lot Mom, I missed you, too Good boy Give me a hug Mom, are you finished? I’m hungry I’m done wrapping the dumplings. Just let me cook them and we’re done How many do you want to eat? I want to eat lots and lots How many are lots and lots? Would thirty pieces be enough? Enough Let’s have dinner. Come dinner’s ready – Is it delicious? – Yes it is Then eat some more. If it’s not enough, I will make more Let’s give a clap. Isn’t it delicious? You are a bit much. Why did you not let me know you were coming back? Dad wanted to give you a surprise Surprise? How is it? Were you surprised? What do you think? It’s all right. If you got scared into a heart attack, I will be responsible for the heart, since I’m a heart surgeon When did you learn to crack a joke? My son and I missed you every single day while we were in the U.S We returned to find out if you missed us, too Dan Dan, did you know that while I’m here, I think about you every day? Everyday, I would wonder if you are eating well, – having sweet dreams. Did you know that? – Yes, Mom Out of both of us, you only missed our child? – Dan Dan, when you finish eating the dumplings, remember to drink your yogurt milk – Yes, Mom Milk is nutritionally good for you. When I drink it, I will grow up fast and be able to protect Mom What about Dad? Dad is already a man who doesn’t need my protection You little rascal. I raised you for nothing Have you booked a hotel yet? What hotel? Then where will you live?
If you have not made a booking yet, I’ll book it for you after dinner No, you want us to live in a hotel? Only you. Dan Dan will be with me – Dan Dan. Come and live with me. Okay? – Okay Mom wants to keep you company Why are you so listless? You will be getting married very soon The elder is already buried. Just forget about it Be happy! Getting married is a joyous event Kaoer’s pregnancy is also a happy event. This is called double happiness You ought to be happy! Do you think it’s a good sign? I already left three years ago During those three years, the rascal was by her side Who knows what on earth happened? What’s wrong with you? You? Are you hiding something from me? Do you think I did anything wrong? Milan? What are you doing? Nothing’s the matter Are they both inside? Yes, they are. Let me get you a cup of coffee Wait a minute Don’t let me see anything like that again What are you all talking about? We were just casually chatting Brother, we’ve already finished preparing the wedding venue Sister-in-law said she couldn’t leave the station right now and wants you to go over there first Have a look I am not going. Just book it for me. I have no preference All right, I’ll go with Jinyi Older Brother, you don’t look so good Would you like to go to the hospital for a check up? There’s no need All right, I’ll go there with Jinyi right now Mochi, don’t overthink Being happy is important. Lift up your spirits! Be happy! Let’s go Why did you not tell me about Bai Kaoer’s pregnancy earlier? You already knew about it Why? Did I not tell you to let me know about everything related to Bai Kaoer? You disappointed me! Kaoer said that her husband did not even know about it So of course, you should not know before him What did you say? You mean Prior to this, Geng Mochi also did not know Bai Kaoer was pregnant? What on earth is happening? This is a major matter. Why would a wife not let her husband know that she’s pregnant? Tell me. How much do you know? What is actually happening? Tell me! Kaoer’s child had been found to have heart disease during the check-up I know. Then after? Geng Mochi had previously said to Kaoer that if their child is found to have inherited his heart disease, then the child should be aborted He did not want the child to suffer immediately after being born That is to say, Bai Kaoer is scared that Geng Mochi doesn’t want this child, so she kept this from him So Geng Mochi right up till now is not aware that the child has inherited his heart disease Now, that is interesting Interesting Why are there so many swans? Don’t you know about this? The swan symbolizes love and eternity They stay with each other forever, never to be apart Since ancient times, the swan has been a symbol of eternal love Who thought of this? Me, of course! No wonder Only a romantic and detailed person like you can think of such an idea I just simply think that for their love to reach this point today, it’s not easy at all Besides, the swan is also an auspicious symbol – I hope their love relationship in days ahead will be peaceful and loving – Right
I also hope that nothing else happens, too Mochi’s body is already like that Completing the wedding will finally fulfill his long-held wish It’s also to show his sincerity to Kaoer Do you know that he told me once that the biggest promise that a man can make to the woman he loves is to give her a wonderful wedding? Exactly. That’s how I see it, too Oh, yes. Is Milan a close friend of Kaoer? That’s right. Why? It’s nothing, but that person makes me feel uneasy You don’t really like her, right? It’s not really about liking or not liking, either To be honest with you, that woman has a flawed character She was previously an entertainment reporter for a newspaper Later, she almost went to jail for blackmailing Qi Shuli – Blackmailing? – Aren’t you surprised? Mochi and I didn’t really want her to become his assistant There was no choice. She is Kaoer’s best friend She was unemployed after being sacked, so Kaoer insisted that we take her in Mochi did not agree but Kaoer didn’t budge No wonder I feel so uncomfortable around her We’ll just let her work for now Mochi also said that if she’s not good, we’ll just fire her I don’t have any good impression of her But you can be sure of this Under my watch, she wouldn’t be able to do anything bad All right Now, you know to get anxious What were you doing before? You should always remind yourself that you are about to be a father She is carrying your child! Teacher Geng, this is the revised wedding schedule. Take a look Are you not feeling well? Milan. Take a seat Milan. These three years, you’ve been by Kaoer’s side Tell me about how she interacted with Qi Shuli I won’t allow any information being withheld It’s actually nothing Qi Shuli was the one taking care of Kaoer during the three years you weren’t here Everyone knows that After Kaoer was discharged from the hospital, she lived at Qi Shuli’s house for a period of time – She even lived at his house? – Yes They lived together for a period of time During the Spring Festival the year before last, Qi Shuli even took Kaoer to Hainan Island There, she rested for a while I know what you’re feeling But Teacher Geng, we didn’t know if and when you were ever coming back during the three years you were gone Also Kaoer’s memories were all wrong It’s normal that she got close to Qi Shuli Did they spend day and night together? There are some things I don’t even know how to say Before she went to Beijing, she was always with Qi Shuli If there’s anything between them, it’s not overboard. Right? I didn’t say this with any other meaning I don’t even know how to say it Just think that I’m saying nonsense Milan, do you know what you’re saying now? I was a little suspicious in the beginning, but now that you say that, I’m assured Can I trust someone who talks bad behind her best friend’s back? Do you know how you ended up working here? It’s because Kaoer begged me! She thinks of you as her biological sister; treated you so sincerely, but this is how you slander her behind her back?! I didn’t lie Do you think I’m that dumb to believe your words? She is my wife! Would I not know what she’s like? Get out! I just knew that Kaoer wasn’t that type of person Why am I so narrow-minded? Mom You are about to marry Are you running around? No, I came to the station to ask for a vacation leave Taking a vacation is good With the way you are now, you won’t be able to work Taking care of the baby is the most important I know Also, let me tell you. Don’t eat randomly You cannot catch a cold or get sick During pregnancy, you cannot randomly get shots or take in medications Mom You think I’m nagging, don’t you? Let me tell you The first pregnancy is most important If anything happens, wanting to have a second one will be hard – Mom. I want to ask you a question – Okay What question? If I’m saying if during the time you were pregnant with me,
and you discovered that I would be an abnormal child, would you still give birth to me? Abnormal? Why are you asking this? I’m just a little nervous so I’m asking I’m really worried that the child will have some form of problems When I was pregnant with you, I also never slept or ate well all day I was only worried that the child would be missing an elbow or a leg I kept imagining things all day What if the child really has a problem? If there really is a problem and I still gave birth, I would definitely raise you for the rest of your life even if you were a dummy Why? Why do you even have to ask? Aren’t all moms in the world the same? Mom, I understand Tell me if you need anything else I’ll prepare it I want to talk to you I feel that it’s necessary for us to talk openly for once I think you know what hopes I have when I came back Qianshan I’m grateful for what you and your parents have done these years You took care of Dan Dan so well I… You surely know that is not what I want to talk to you about Three years I’ve been thinking of ways to fix our relationship I was scared I’d be rejected so I’ve been hesitant But I don’t want to stall anymore I’ve atoned for three years. Is that not enough? What are you saying? Don’t call it atonement You didn’t do any criminal or unethical misdeeds It looks like you still won’t forgive me I’ve actually been very regretful I used to focus everything on work, and I totally ignored you and our family When I was stressed, I even domestically abused you I’m sorry. I didn’t know the meaning of domestic abuse before I also didn’t know how damaging domestic abuse would be to your physical and psychological health I also wasn’t a good fatherly example to Dan Dan In the three years since the divorce, I’ve tried many kinds of self-help Reading books, visiting a therapist for counseling I really know that I’m wrong. I’ve changed I believe that between us, there are still feelings. Right? So I really want to make up my past mistakes and redeem our marriage. Yingzhi I’m begging you to give me another chance. Okay? I’m really happy that you told me all of these I’ve seen your changes during these years But you don’t know how harmful your actions have been to me In this world, there is no path to go back As for paths I’ve already walked, I don’t want to repeat them Of course, I really appreciate the feelings between us After all, we’ve lived with each other for many years Even though there is no romantic love, there is still familial love We still have Dan Dan I think we will always be a family I am really aware of your thoughts when you came back, but I’m sorry There is no possibility between us anymore Even if you reconsider it for the child’s sake, do you still refuse to turn back? I will raise Dan Dan with you I will also fulfill the responsibilities of a mother Dan Dan I really love him I won’t give him any less maternal love Not being able to give him a complete family, I think Dan Dan will understand when he’s older Were you happy being alone these three years? It’s been very fulfilling and satisfying I’ve been working hard in my career The feeling of providing for oneself is quite fulfilling I like the life I have now Okay
I know what your thoughts are now You are looking great I’m happy for you I respect your choice and I won’t force you to do things you don’t want to do Don’t worry. I’m not the Qianshan from before Thank you Dan Dan, let’s go home Don’t you find things chaotic enough? Why are you coming to my wedding ceremony with Geng Mochi? Of course, I have to come I protected you for 3 years but you just turned around and got married to Geng Mochi Do you know how much my heart hurts? Do you have a heart illness? What are you hurt about? I just want to see how you look wearing a wedding dress Stop messing around! He is still at the height of his anger If you attend our wedding, don’t you just want us to fight? I don’t care If I don’t receive your invitation tomorrow, I will tell Geng Mochi about his child having a heart illness Qi Shuli, are you forcing me to end things with you? End things if you want It’s not like it hasn’t happened before This matter is set then Also on the day of the wedding, I must personally hand you over to Geng Mochi Your father has already made a stand that he won’t be coming to the wedding I am Jie’s older brother, which means I am also your older brother It is most suitable for me to do it You are pestering endlessly It’s okay whatever you call me I’m indeed pestering endlessly You have to let me attend the wedding, or I’ll tell him the truth If he knows that the child you’re carrying has a problem, he will definitely feel worse than me having to see you get married Don’t say anything about the child I will tell him myself It’s not that I won’t tell him about the child It’s just that I don’t know how to tell him He’ll be upset once he knows But I want to have this child. The child is innocent If he knows about the child’s situation, he won’t let me give birth to it That’s why, don’t come to the wedding It’s no use even if you threaten me, I won’t let youâ€” Mr. Qi. You’re welcome to attend our wedding At the most sacred moment between me and Kaoer, of course, you must witness it Do you have anything else to say to him? Mochi Do you have anything to say to me? I want to tell you The child What about the child? I… I don’t want to talk about the child today I’m sorry, Mochi I didn’t purposely want to make you upset I was wrong Don’t be angry at me. Okay? I’m not angry at you Maybe because I’m too tired these past few days Then let’s go on a honeymoon after the wedding You can have a good rest Where do you want to go for the honeymoon? You didn’t want to go to the Maldives, so we can go anywhere Let’s go to Hainan then Hainan? Have you been there before? I did Who did you go with? Why is he asking that? If he knows I went there with Qi Shuli, he’ll be upset for sure Even though I went to recover and nothing happened with Qi Shuli, he will still misunderstand. Right? My parents Mochi
Mochi! The situation is like that All four suspects have been captured They were formally charged yesterday When the trial date is set, we will notify you You can choose to appear in court or avoid the trial I am not going Also the defendant’s lawyer has requested to meet you He wants to, first of all, understand the case in more detail Secondly, he wants to convey a message from the family members They wish to get your forgiveness I’m not seeing them! I’m not seeing anyone! They want me to understand?! People like that should go to hell! Even if I die, I won’t understand them! Hey, Miss Milan! Police Station Miss Milan – Hello – Who are you? I am the lawyer hired by Zhang Hua and the others. My surname is Cheng This is my Hey! Miss Milan, let’s talk! – There’s nothing good to talk about – Miss Milan! What are you doing? I know you are the victim and I can understand your pain, but the matter has already happened so you should face it Running away won’t solve the problem You can understand? You just want me to give forgiveness so I could defend them while in court Let me tell you! I won’t ever forgive them in this lifetime! Miss Milan. Actually, I’m not here to help them out Frankly, I just want to represent the defendants and their family members in discussing a compensation method that’s acceptable with you Whatever conditions, demands, tell me and I will relay your message to them I will do my best to satisfy you. Okay? Okay. I only have one condition Tell them to die! Die! Miss Milan! Miss Milan! Doing it this way, would not help you at all Okay, let’s say they are convicted of life sentence, but what about you? You will still have to live in this city You will get married and have children There are many good things waiting for you But what if they accidentally pass out information about this matter How will you continue to live in this city? What do you mean by that? What does accidentally passing out the information mean? I don’t mean anything else To be frank, the defendants’ family members feel just as bad as you do now They are also feeling upset and pained over this matter So they don’t want to get this matter out of proportion You can sit down and discuss everything – We don’tâ€” – Scram! I’m not afraid of you! My life is already ruined, and you still want me to forgive them By what right do they bully a weak woman? What? I’ll curse them forever and forever so that they will not get a good death Even if they die 1,000 or 10,000 times, it’s not enough to pay for the crime they’ve committed! – Hey, Milanâ€” – And you, I don’t want to see you ever again! Why are you here? Milan, I’m looking for Mochi Have you seen him? He didn’t come home last night His cell phone was turned off Are you having a fight? Not really I was talking to Qi Shuli on the phone, and he overheard us He is a little upset What else did he say last night? Nothing much I guess he is probably nervous You have heard of pre-wedding jitters. Right? – Men can have pre-wedding jitters, too? – Why not? It’s the same. It’s either fear or anxiety Sit down. Look at you You are about to get married, but you don’t look like a happy bride at all How can I be happy? I don’t know why Lately, it’s like there are thorns growing between me and Mochi Whatever I say, he would look doubtful Especially when I was paying respect to Qi Shuli’s mother I made him angry Could it be because of your confused memories that’s why he’s angry? – Confused memories? – Yes What do you mean? Maybe you’ve imposed the memory about Qi Shujie onto Geng Mochi He surely would be upset He would think that he’s not the person whom you love How is that possible? I’ve always been certain about my memory for Mochi – Very certain? – Yes Not necessarily so Milan, do you know something? You really want to know? Tell me. Is there anything we can’t tell each other? Okay You’ve always thought Geng Mochi eats meat – That he’s a carnivore. Right? – Yes Wrong. He is a vegetarian He never eats meat Then who eats meat? It’s Qi Shujie We all know that Geng Mochi doesn’t eat meat,
but you firmly believed that he’s a meat eater Then please try to remember. Has he ever eaten the meat dishes you’ve cooked? He is a vegetarian You’ve imposed your memory about Qi Shujie onto Geng Mochi Why would he be happy? – Why is it like this? – There’s more Do you remember that rabbit you like to hug? – Who gave it to you? – Mochi? Wrong. It’s Qi Shujie When you had just met, he bought it for you for your birthday Many people were there, including Yingzhi You can ask her if you don’t believe me No wonder he dislikes that rabbit so much There’s more, it’s Qi Shujie who took you to the Maldives, but you’ve been wanting Geng Mochi to take you there How can he be happy? It’s Qi Shujie who doesn’t wear striped shirts, but you remembered it as Geng Mochi Yingzhi and I are both witnesses When we used to go shopping with you, you wouldn’t buy striped shirts for Qi Shujie, because you thought he looked like a zebra We both thought it was funny Do you think Geng Mochi can be happy then? Why hasn’t he told me? He doesn’t want to hurt you You are still a recuperating patient He dotes on you Milan, tell me, what else have I remembered wrong? Tell me quickly Will you believe what I say? Outside love’s door Whoever betrayed whom is the one waiting Laughter and tears are constantly repeating Is being loved good or bad Wantonly uncover the mystery And let fate be unable to make arrangements You said that loving you has nothing to do with the future We are waiting for the clock to slow down Sparks fell in love with the great sea Sinking into its embrace after blossoming If we can accept this unexpected situation Let the pain be more straightforward Gambling on all victories and defeats If I can love you so I understand all those reasons Even if I turn into dust for you With us being so in love with each other I can laugh to my heart’s content even while crying That bitterness is also used to irrigate the wound That bitterness is also used to irrigate the wound You said that loving you has nothing to do with the future We are waiting for the clock to slow down Sparks fell in love with the great sea Sinking into its embrace after blossoming If we can accept this unexpected situation Let the pain be more straightforward Gambling on all victories and defeats If I can love you so I understand all those reasons Even if I turn into dust for you Even if I turn into dust for you Sparks fell in love with the great sea Sinking into its embrace after blossoming If we can accept this unexpected situation Let the pain be more straightforward Gambling on all victories and defeats If I can love you so I understand all those reasons I am willing to accompany you in turning into dust