Pak Pak Pakaak – Full Length Marathi Movie – Nana Patekar & Saksham Kulkarni

Saksham Kulkarni Narayani Shastri Usha Nadkarni, Jyoti Subhash, Prachi Shah And Nana Patekar Hail Bhutya, Ghost of the forest! We bow before thee! We are at your Mercy, Bhutya Nobody dares venture near the forest And invoke Bhutya’s wrath! Bhutya… the ghost of village Mangalpada Strange that Bhutya’s not been Angry for some-time now! Yeah yeah… quite right! Four goats a month Why would he be angry? Yeah yeah… quite right! You deserve to be slapped you two-tongued viper! Did you get as many garlands at your wedding? But l didn’t marry a cheap ”dance-girl” like you did! I’ll smack you! l dare you to…! Stop fighting and pray instead Lord, Protect us from Bhutya! Please let the final days of our lives be peaceful! All hail the mighty Bhutya! original concept by sai paranjpye dialogue sanjay mone -Can l go join them in the dance? -No! That’s not a marriage procession! -When will Dad return? -Soon! He’s gone to Town? lt’s quite late! His work keeps him till late! God! l hope he didn’t take the shortcut through the forest… Oh God! The fear of Bhutya Looms like a mountain! costumes manjiri Joglekar This shortcut is anything but short! Must reach the village before dark make-up abhay mohite Giddy up lads! l’m counting on you dances sonia parchure Faster! Faster! Protect me from Bhutya Oh Lord!

art: teddy maurya mahesh salgaokar audiography alok de cinematography sanjay jadhav Epidemic, Accident, Death, failure are all Bhutya’s doing! editing: imran khan faisal khan executive producer ulhas shevde music: k. c. loy aashish rego Take this sacrificial goat, And spare the villagers, please! produced by aashish rego Gaja! What were you doing in the jungle? Bhutya did this to you? Are you crazy, going into the forbidden forest! Bhutya’s wrath has been evoked! Run for your lives!! story – screenplay – direction gautam joglekar The sun rises! The sun rises and so does Chikhloo! Chikhloo awakes, and the village loses sleep! Cock-A-Doodle-Do!! Chikhloo smiles, and The village frowns! A dam of mischief Bursts upon them! ‘DAMU’S WlFE BEATS HlM UP EVERY DAY’ The King of Mischief Sound his bugle… ushering chaos! Saalu, the village belle, struts around, causing hearts to flutter

We’re done for! Oops… another one of his pranks! He misses no chance to trouble villagers And finally, thankfully, the sun sets Chikhloo sleeps and the village sighs in relief! but then peace lasts only until morning, -I’ll kill you today! -But, l didn’t do anything!! Then who pelted Subhan’s rooster? -Says who? -Says the rooster! -You hit a poor innocent animal? -Can l ever do such a thing? Who deflated the grocer’s bicycle? -Grandma l swear -Stop swearing falsely! Else I’ll take you apart! lt’s impossible to live in this village anymore Everyone’s always complaining about you They say you were born And with it you killed your parents! Now get dressed and Buzz off to school! -Hey! -Oops! Sorry! Hey! Put it down thief! -lt was lying around! -Yeah yeah… l know! What sends you off to school today? Hey… why did you tell my granny that l -deflated your tyres? -Who else could it be? l got punished for something l didn’t do! Just as well! So l might as well do What l have got punished for! Leave my bike alone! The brainless idiot! Babnya, Sudya… Wait for me! Oh God! We tried avoiding him but he’s caught up! Mom will skin me alive if l’m seen with Chikhloo! And my Dad’ll thrash me to pulp! Why didn’t you wait for me? -I’ve been told not to befriend you -Who said that? My father says you’re the devil incarnated! Your dad’s no saint either He has it going with other’s wives When the husband’s away! Don’t insult my dad What will you do? – I’ll beat you up C’mon Baban Err.. my parents too fear that you’ll spoil me! You know how it is pal! Grown-ups are jealous cause we have so much fun, and they can’t! But tell me You Rotten Bamboo! -Are you a rotten bamboo? -No! Well then Chikhloo… you Son of a Hen! -Are you a Son of a Hen? -Who said? These darned elders! Mom calls me a bone head!

-Who goes to school? -Me -Then you can’t be a bonehead -You’re right But mom says that your company will rub off on me How is it possible? Think about it Does your Mom smoke even though she stays in your smoker dad’s company? Elders are liars. That’s why their teeth fall and their hair turns gray! But we must ignore them Aren’t we best friends? Eh? Cock-a-doodle-do Cock-a-doodle-do! This one’s just for you! l know what a tough time l had getting it Stole it from Shambhu’s orchard! Here Rascals! You said you’d never meet this brat again! Want me to thrash you? You want to be a petty thief like him when you grow up? Stop crying. We’ll share this fruit on the way l swear I’ll teach you a lesson you’ll never forget! Bhutya! Bhutya! Calm down Gaja. lts alright! Wither and die Bhutya! God punished uncle Gaja because he’s a wife beater, isn’t it? What gossiper feeds you this nonsense? l heard YOU telling dad last night Let’s go home! No more roaming in the sun for you! Bhutya! Don’t hurt me! Gaja’s doomed! Let’s prepare his pyre! I’ll go to the jungle to destroy Bhutya Mother Goddess, banish that vile spirit to hell! May he suffer in eternal pain! Control yourself woman! You’re scaring the kids! Why aren’t they at school? Their father is unwell so they’ve not come ! OK sit. And why is Sudip Gursale absent? His father’s returning from the city today -ls he is unwell too? -He getting released from prison! What??? Why? The teacher before you really troubled students, so Sudip’s dad beat him up! That teacher went straight to hospital, and Sudip’s dad went to jail! Er… enough now! Today We’ll learn Mathematics! My dear student, why don’t you simply drop out of school? You obviously suffer here then why waste money on books, fees? Sir, here’s Sublya! And why are you late? I’d gone to the flour mill Here comes your Romeo All day he hovers around you ! Why do you tease him so? By now I’d have pulled him into the sugarcane fields Just look at him! Buddy, for wooing who are you being so brave?

And going into Bhutya’s jungle alone on no moon night? Have you lost it? Want me killed? Relax and watch the fun! But isn’t it dangerous? l don’t care Fortune favours the brave Why go to the jungle? Such a youthful man How would you know if he is youthful? l don’t need to take him to sugarcane fields to tell that! Shhh… not so loud ! What are you looking at? Just thinking, Bhutya has really affected our lives, has he not? And you sat there listening? Haven’t l warned you not to hear or speak about that vile ghost? Now back to studies Sir, you fear Bhutya too? Everyone does except you, who fears neither ghosts or Gods! Enough now. Back to studies Do ghosts eat humans? Why not go to the forest and find out for yourself? lf he says ‘No’ you’ll get your answer! And if he says ‘Yes’, then we’ll be rid of you forever! Eh? Enough. As l was saying Hey… stop! Wait! Where are you kids going? The forest! No no nobody goes there! Come back l say Ha ha ha! Sir must be shitting bricks! He’ll be blamed for sending me to the forest! lf something happened to us -When do we go back? -Sissy, first let’s explore a bit Nnnnot mmme -Fortune favors the brave -l don’t care You’re being a real coward – Alright… l’m a coward l’m scared too! Baban, Sudya wait! Ok go! Good riddance to bad rubbish! ls anyone here?

Jaglya, is he dead yet? Forget him! He’ll die of his own deeds! Let’s go! -Has the boy come to his senses? -Mmmmmm -But why did he go into the forest? -Mmmmmm Was he alone or was someone else with him? Mmmmmmm Spit on my hands if you wish, but for God’s sake say something! Something odd is going on! Humph! Really helpful that was! Are you a boy or beast? Have you no shame? Ever think what your poor granny goes through? Have you brains at all, you bone head?! No more school for you! But kids are like flowers that bloom in God’s own garden! And you’re a blooming idiot? Don’t teach me you nitwit Can’t control his students, and calls himself a teacher! Shut up ! Not a word !! Gaurajje, please take a break! Don’t you ever tire of blabbering? Quiet now! Please wake up Chikhloo! Nothing has happen to you We all are here Ajje

My pet! Mother Goddess, I’ll offer you sweets Make it sweets and booze! Why did you venture into the forest? What’ll l do if something happened to you? To die at Bhutya’s hands? He’s never going to misbehave henceforth He’ll be a good boy and obey his teacher! That’s just what he did l had better leave now When will you learn to behave? You’re alive today only because of the Goddess favors your Granny! Why, the Goddess even bandaged your wound and brought you back safe and sound to the village border Bandaged my wounds??? This brat was born and his parents died I’ve always said that He’s is no ordinary boy, but the devil himself Dad! l won’t take any nonsense about Chikhloo! I’ll slap you so hard, you’ll forget about him ls she any better than him? Refusing to get married! How long do we hide your age and lie that you’re still 25? 28 years of age and still unmarried! I’ve already sent word to Ashokrao in the city We’ll finalize the marriage next week! Marry that drunk yourself? l’m not interested! What did you say? Don’t you dare raise your hand on me Hmmmm! l wonder who’ll win this hot prize! What did you say? l wasn’t talking to you Well, to whom then? There’s no one else here! -ls this what your father taught you? -Keep my father out of this Oh? Are you ashamed of accepting him? Just because you’re the headman’s son, think you can get away with anything? Huh! She doesn’t realize who she’s messing with You ass, you’re yet to sprout a moustache, and you want to play Roadside Romeo? One kick in your groin, and your family tree will wither right here! Don’t mess with me! Now get going! You’re safe because l don’t fight with girls Won’t you scram…? What do we do with her? This is Chikhloo’s wretched influence! We’d better think of a way out before it is too late! Hmmm! Your granny has gone to the temple to pray for your soul You’re grounded l’m keeping both eyes on you Oh, that wretched day when you were born! No wonder you’ve become such a pest? You’re such a menace! When you went into the forest yesterday, I’d hoped that you’d never return Everyone is saying that

the Goddess saved you just for your granny’s sake! Why don’t you run away from home? Only then will your granny have some peace of mind! Hey… where do you think you’re going? People say that the Goddess did your granny a good turn by saving you! Nonsense ! lf the Goddess really wanted to help your granny, she’d have let you die! You wretch! Come here, I’ll skin you alive Only because I’d agreed to keep an eye on you Why… why the cap? Where do you think you’re going? -Why are you going there? -Your banter has loosened my bowels Don’t try to make excuses Are you going to follow me in here too? Ouch… why you little devil Alright! You think you’re smart? Well, l’m double smart! This old woman has beaten us at it! She’s already here to bribe God Amba stop blabbering! Hear hear! WE are blabbering! How do we send our kids to school? My little boy answered back to his father Who do you suppose teaches him all this? Chikhloo’s just an innocent kid! lnnocent enough to puncture people’s bicycles? My kid doesn’t drink milk anymore Chikhloo frightened him into believing that he’d be born a goat in his next life, if he drank it! lt’s better than being born from your womb! I’d rather be barren than bear a kid like Chikhloo! Your brat could give the devil a complex! Hand him over to us We’ll straighten him out Starve him for a few days! He’s not spared a single house in the whole village! Will someone have to die before she takes action? Let’s ostracize them both! Only then can there be peace Amba, watch your tongue Just some childish pranks Childish pranks? Old woman, Chikhloo has invited that demon into the village! He has joined hands with Bhutya to destroy us all ‘The Goddess saved you and even treated your wound…’ Saalu??? Why do you look as if a you’ve just swallowed acid? My parents! Forever trying to get rid of me ‘I’ve agreed to Mr. Ashokrao Kadam’s proposal”! What now? I’d rather jump into this well and drown But how can you drown when you know how to swim? Ok… ok… let me think I’ll find a solution! Sure you will, my ‘knight in shining armor’! But first stop wetting your pants When you returned from the forest they were yellow -why did you go into the forest -But why won’t you marry? Even Ajji keeps telling you ‘Marry before it is too late!’ I’ll marry only if l find a worthy man ! And what kind of a man would that be? Your marriage Saalu is like fine sand Try to clasp it it slips through your hands! Dozens of suitors we lined up for you But each one you find unworthy and bland!

But all that eludes us due to your ‘NO’ s There’s something l don’t understand! Out with your secret You don’t have to shout You can whisper it softly in my ear At this rate Saalu, will you ever get wed? l’m really beginning to fear Someone who’s gallant, someone who’s strong Someone who can lead, and can do no wrong Someone whose gaze can cut through steel Someone who’s a dream and yet so real! Who’s fought many battles, and won many wars, I’ll ride away with him on his shining black horse! Lord oh lord! You’ve answered my call And sent me my man the best of them all! Lord oh Lord have you no heart? l asked for a man and you sent me a fart! Lord oh Lord, since you ignore my call I’d better not get married at all! Your marriage Saalu is like fine sand Try to clasp it it slips through your hands! Dozens of suitors We line up for you But each one you find unworthy and bland! Give us our frolic We need our fun We want to rock With the band But all that eludes us Due to your ‘NO’ s There’s something we don’t understand! Out with your secret You don’t have to shout You can whisper it softly in my ear At this rate Saalu, will you ever get wed? l’m really beginning to fear I’ll settle for a farmer, who toils on his land Wishing to feed me with his caring hands Be my private scarecrow, and guard me night n day And treat me like a flower, in a soft gentle way! Lord oh lord! You’ve answered her call And sent her a man the best of them all! Lord oh Lord You acted so cruelly! She asked for a man and you sent her a bully! Looks like the Lord is ignoring my call So I’d better not get married at all! Hmm… you sure are a tough cookie aren’t you? But have no fear, when good ol’ Chikhloo’s here! I’ve already found you the perfect match! One you’ll be unable to resist! Who’s that? Bhutya! Why you scoundrel… wait till l get my hands on you…! Shut up!

That’s better! Bhutya W..w..who are you? Bhutya! Hey smart ass! You can’t be Bhutya! Ghosts have feet that face backwards! Don’t you read fairy tales? So l was right! What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue? Maybe you thought, after yesterday I’ll never come back? The cat got your tongue? My foot is alright! l have to move on Wait? Have to move on lf you’re not Bhutya, then who are you? Why have you stuck hay all over? Don’t you have clothes? lt was you that nursed my wound yesterday, was it not? What is your name? Where do you stay? How did you land here? Doesn’t Bhutya scare you? C’mon… speak up! ls it bad? Let me massage it My granny always says that l’m over-smart! Where’s the Ghost then? Feet are a vital part of the body! They keep the body mobile Do you know Bhutya? Where are you from? How long have you been here? WHY dig up, what lies buried beneath the debris of time? Since when has he had fever? Three-four days? Three days now -Did he complain of de-hydration? -Yes Headache, body ache, itchiness in the throat? Yes Giddiness, strained jaws? Exactly what he said lt’s a very rare fever! Unheard of in these parts Did he eat anything peculiar? Enough of your questions! What’s happened to my child? lts is a very unique ailment That’s why you’re here! So examine the boy, give him what you must and get going! The boy was lucky that l was in town

Timely treatment has Saved him… or else Or else I’d have skinned you alive! So YOU were the lucky one! ls my child going to be alright? – Yes, dear sister Call her Mrs. Chieftain, you lowly scum! Don’t you dare to equal us! -Yes Mrs. Chieftain, madam! -Get lost now! Those you know are lesser And those who have petty values Why get affected by such poor souls? Finally he has time for his home ‘n’ family! Your friend Raghu has returned from Mumbai, he was asking for you – l met him -What did he say? -He was convincing me to go to Mumbai Doctors there still haven’t found a cure for Jaundice and Herpes while you’ve conquered both! ln Mumbai you’ll mint money he said! -And what did you say? -l’m considering it Rahgu’s house in Mumbai is vacant! Plus a small office replete with servants so l can set up my dispensary! Won’t they provide you with a wife too? There’s no dearth of women in Mumbai but where do l find someone like you? What’s so special about me? Your scent! l’m addicted to it l told Raghu too long without my wife’s scent l start losing my breath! Have you no shame? He must’ve been shocked! Why worry about him think of what l want Stay away This love bite mark refuses to go l have a harrowing time hiding it under my sari Neighbors ask all kinds of embarrassing questions Well don’t go out then! Oh yeah? And what do l do sitting at home all day? -Come close… I’ll tell you! -Go away! Empty words! Alright! l hereby pledge all of next week in your service! -Liar -l swear You’d just promised you’ll not leave my side Go now, and you’ll never see me again! ls Doctor Sakharam in? My husband’s dying What are you waiting for? Go… quick! -Doctor Sakharam…? -That’s me A snake bit my husband -What kind of snake? -A Krait l’m really scared -Don’t worry! Where is he? -Bellarpada Give me just a moment Here… take this Bolt the door from within l might be gone all night lf the soul derives complete satisfaction in helping others, why would one yearn for more? You’ve been summoned to the Chieftain’s house

His son is running high fever Expected reaction to my medicine ! Don’t worry, he’ll be fine by morning l don’t care. You’ll have to come now l am needed more by this lady I’ll come by in the morning! He’ll pay dearly for this! He’s out of danger He’ll be up and about by morning! l can’t thank you enough Why are you paying me? You’re like my mother try to catch some sleep Let me go… please my kid’s mute… my Saguna Flesh has burned to ash; all senses charred! WHY then would the soul linger on? WHY? Time feels like a maze that seems to lead nowhere and everywhere at the same time! A perennial fear looms threatening menacingly! The fear of… humans! Heinous acts that fiercest of animals would be ashamed of! Humans call it ‘SPORT’!!! Dilip… you fool… you let the deer slip away But l swear l had hit him Deer are swift as the wind We’ve lost it for sure…!

We’ll find him… writhing in agony somewhere! Run… Ghost! Help… Ghost!! The human race is the pride of all evolution? On what basis? Mayhem? Massacre? The sounds of silence help simmer down the turmoil The soul finds tranquility in the lush dense forest And Ayurveda! This great science instills strength to recuperate, physically and mentally while encouraging unconditional, unilateral progress! A past moment never returns! Time always moves over a one-way path! Hey! l asked you something! Life is beautiful! Must strive to keep it beautiful -Who are you? -l won’t give up! Answer me! Life is beautiful. Make it even more beautiful! Will you be my friend? Refuse, and I’ll go tell everyone your truth! -O my God! Finished! -Why? Chintamani, Sarjya, Laxumana, Pradyumna -it’s all over! -What’s all over? Peace used to reign here Now people will invade us. One, two, fifty, hundred, two hundred! The whole village will come! They’ll burn everything down to ashes! They will hunt… even with Their bellies full This cruel, selfish human race! -You… you’re a man too! -l’m just a little boy! Yes but you’ll grow up To be like them l won’t… l won’t l swear on you! Don’t you trust me? Trust! Sounds ancient just like Tuberculosis… TB! ln olden days there was no remedy for TB Dry weather, right exercise, Shatapal ghee, Dashamuladi ghee, Shitopaladi powder these can bring TB under control Go and tell everyone! Let the cruel man roam free in the jungle! Go quick Why should l go? The jungle doesn’t belong to you alone! lt’s mine too There… there… there they come! With saws n axes! To hack down and destroy everything! Men will bring ruin! Bhutya’ll vanish forever! lf that is the case, I’ll not bring anyone here! Like you, l’m not too fond of them either Did you hear what l just said? There’s nothing more left to be said! My boy’s started using abuses these days! Who’s taught him that? He opened my cattle shed and drove all cattle out lt took me two whole days to round them back together! He deliberately gave my guests wrong directions and sent them to the next village! They’re so furious they won’t talk to me now! The other day he locked me inside my house l ripped my coat, trying to reach out to release the latch! Now we’ll take matters into our own hands and bash your boy up! He’s a bad influence on all the kids! How much longer can this go on? We ought to ostracize you both! isn’t that right chief? Calm down all of you! What do you suggest? Forget her! We must first drive the ghost out of him! What ghost? Bhutya has possessed your boy! He must be cast out! Old woman, do you hear? Hey Hey! Stop acting pricey! I’ve promised you l wouldn’t bring anyone here Ok! lf l even breathe a word of this to anyone, don’t ever talk to me again! How’s that? Oh come down now! What are you … a monkey? We can be friends best friends!

Cock-a-doodle-do Cock-a-doodle-do l swore upon you didn’t l? Now who else do l swear upon? My parents? But they are already dead! My grandmother? Even false swears will have no effect on her! She’s as tough as nails! Believe me Bhutya, Even l hate the villagers! They’re a bad lot! Jealous! Just because l’m smart! l used to be scared of them and now they’re petrified of me! They call me the devil incarnate! imagine Conditional weakness or damage to both sensory and motor organs due to possible accident or injury during pregnancy! Resulting in behavior that weakens mental functions! Effective remedy available, hence treatment possible! 50 kg Amla paste ought to be plastered on each and every villager’s head! You said it! l want to teach the villagers a lesson they’ll never forget! Will you help me? I’ll not tell a soul! I’ll operate from the inside and you from the outside the village! We’ll sandwich them isn’t it a great plan? Reactive aggression only breeds more aggression What? Psychological balancing required! I’d prescribe two Mandukparini pills twice a day after meals imagine what a hilarious scene it’ll be! I’ll go home if you continue to ignore me Alright then, l’m off. I’ve to get a thrashing from Granny! Nowadays her thrashings don’t hurt me but l cry just to satisfy her After all, Granny’s all l have So long then! Need anything from the village? lf so, l’m your man Do you like candy? Our grocer’s a fool I’ll steal it right under his nose Why did you commit theft? Why? Why do you steal? Pandu! Why are you beating up my child? What did he do? -He stole candy! -Says who? Says me! Where did he get money to buy candy? l gave it to him Don’t cry baby! Shhh my child, shhh What a civilized way to Behave! Just because the child is mute and can’t defend himself, you beat him up like this? Life is beautiful! l must strive to make it better Scoundrel, every day you shame me before the panchayat! But… but The grocer, Mhamdya, Sopanya, your master -the list of complainers is endless! -Who are they to tell you? Trying to be smart? -Granny… not so hard! I’ll die! -Good riddance that’ll be! I’ll die he says! This is the last warning! One more complaint and I’ll break your leg! Granny… Gaurakka’s howling! -You’re not fooling me! -Shhh… listen What’s the matter with her? Who cast this evil spell upon my cow !

Don’t move from here or else My darling Kalyani is dying! lt’s the end of my world! Try applying wet turmeric on the wound Will that cure her? Who cast an evil eye upon my cow? What will l do now? Gaura… stop lamenting so! Kalyani’s still alive isn’t she? Pray to God! He’ll keep her that way No one can save the cow now! lts Bhutya’s wrath! Within three days, Kalyani shall wither and die! Shut your inauspicious mouth! I’ll shave-off half my moustache, lf l’m wrong! You lout! Amused by my plight, aren’t you? Chikhloo! Go home! Now! Who cast an evil eye on my darling cow? Hush Gaura! Hush! Wonder if more cattle will be infected What will poor Gaurakka do without Kalyani? Saalu, see if you can make her eat something This mystery-illness is all Bhutya’s doing He’ll eternally burn in hell! Bhutya did NO wrong! What? Are you blabbering in your sleep? l promise I’ll not tell a soul ! The day you mention Bhutya to anyone, Bhutya will disappear forever! Chikhloo… l asked you l’m just blabbering in my sleep l awake and what do l see? Not a single mango is left on my tree And add half a dozen window panes that he’s broken by throwing pebbles. Who’ll pay for all of this? But what is the proof that lt was Chikhloo? Who else is capable of doing this in our village? What’s that brat done now? Not him… actually it was ME You wanted mangoes for your pickle… so l stole them from Shambhu’s orchard, and Chikhloo’s getting the blame instead! Shh! Don’t say a word to anyone. Come now -Call him out at once! -He’s asleep Call him out and thrash him! Or else I’ll go to the district and report him to the police Don’t get over excited you oaf. Chikhloo!! Why you imp, did you steal from his orchard yesterday? Why ask him old woman, when l’m telling you, -YES… YES… he stole them! -Liar! All of yesterday l was in the jungle! Ask Bhutya WHAT??? You went into the jungle? Met BHUTYA? Come down NOW! Do you hear? Why you imp, did you steal from his orchard yesterday? Why ask him old woman, when l’m telling you, YES… YES… he stole them! Why don’t you speak up? See? Let me hand him over to the police! Miserable lout, always Putting me to shame before the village Gaura??? Wait l’m coming Shambhya! Kindly buzz off now! Why you rascal… OOOWCHH! Wait… Stop

Why did you cut my beard? See… see for yourself Looks better? WOW!!! What’s all this? Amazing!!! What’s this? Ouch! Kashththavshadhi! Eternal supply of medicinal herbs! Open your mouth Yuck! lt’s bitter!! Open This is sweet. Give me more Pampered tongue invitation to maladies! Diet control essential! Fresh air, proper exercise Bhutya… an old hag called Gaurakka stays in the village Her cow, Kalyani, is sick A huge boil on her udder Treatment of Oedema What do you blabber Wow… what a place Watch out… snake! How’s the stomach now, Mhadba? Careful! it’ll bite Non-poisonous variety! Antidote for snake poison Sheershadi Agadh brew or powder! Research continues in Kerala, but I’ve cracked the exact concoction! Victims die more from the fear of the bite than from the venom itself! -Only five venomous species in India! -Which are…? Russels Viper, Pit Viper, Krate, Cobra That’s four MAN! The first four are at least useful to agriculture! Hmmm! Tumor near the udders, bleeding, drooping ears, loss of appetite she’s not eaten for three days inactivity, inertia Did you visit her cowshed at night? Symptomatic diagnosis! External applications: Chitrak, Manjishtha, Shigrur and turmeric Shall we kill her? We could poison her! Reactive Destructive Behaviour Long-term treatment advisable! Quit muttering ! Didimi, Talajang, Marjika, Salapan, Kutaj equal measures grind together simmer over slow flame for six hours… Deadly poison! Cow will wither and die Ready by sunset! 100% effect guaranteed! Hmmm! One should be learned Before teaching others a lesson! -l am learned -Must learn some more!

How? Saguna… go to school and study! Good girl! Enjoy school gain knowledge! The village will automatically learn its lesson! Saguna… regular school for me from now on! Saguna… the poison to kill the cow will be ready by sunset! He is surely up to something! l think l’m going to be hit by a missile Enough! Quiet everyone! Now, when do seasonal winds blow? -When it gets really warm -Wrong! Who else can answer? May l Sir? Just pretend that l Have not asked anything! When the sun heats water into vapour and the low pressure belt over the seas begins to blow over the land, it causes winds called seasonal winds, usually starting around December or January -Excellent! -What else did you learn? The teacher was too shell shocked to continue Feed this to the cow! -This will fix her forever! -But she won’t eat anything She’ll eat this! Mix husk nobody’ll come to know! -But what is this? -lt’s lethal poison! Nyagodh, Audumbar, Ashwattha, Plaksha, Vetas… and Chitraav! Apply some on her udders as well! What is going on? -What did you do, you rat? -What did you feed the cow? Speak or else Let’s call everyone! -Hey old woman -No! No don’t! Chikhloo’s killed your cow! l was only giving her medicine Medicine eh? Can you wipe your arse properly? Uncle Shambhu let me explain Today I’ll fix you good! What did you feed her? What did you feed her? What happen? Ajje. They’re making a fuss over nothing l was merely giving medicine to Kalyani Medicine??? What are you up to now? He’s fed her poison! Caught him red handed, didn’t we Jaglya? After killing your parents, now want to murder my precious cow? l did nothing wrong He’s also put poison on the udders! You’re raising the devil himself lf something happens to my cow, you’re finished! Granny… tell them Shut up and come home… Move! Saalu… help!

l can’t believe you poisoned a docile cow! Enough! Move! Cursed child, I’ve failed in bringing you up! You burn in hell for killing a poor animal! This does it! No food for you tonight! Had your mother been alive, she’d have done the same thing! l ought to smack your bottom ! l nearly died there! What do you watch in the sky? Stars, moon, Venus, Mars, Saturn, constellations Do you teach them too? Oh, they teach us! What? Seek your own path! We’ll guide you! -So, have you found your path? -l don’t know! So, there is something you don’t know after all! Come, I’ll show you a path! Mr. Headman! Open the door! Who is it at this hour! You know how late it is? -Brought my friend to meet you! -What friend! Hello Mr. Headman l feel like gobbling up a human today! I’ve done it! I’ve killed Gaurakka’s cow Chikhloo! Where’s that boy? Open the door at once! l didn’t do it! l didn’t Gaurakka, don’t you dare touch Chikhloo! Gaura! Leave him alone! Help… help! Chikhloo… my boy! Calm down and listen to me! My child! My darling child! I’ve been so mean to you! You got insulted and thrashed because of me, while all you really did was help me like a messiah! Please get me more of your amazing medicine! Here, l got you some sweets! l slept in Kalyani’s shed, certain that she was going to die! She is very dear to me! Why l love her even more than my husband! l wake up with the sound of her moo… and lo! Her tumor had vanished; she was fit as a fiddle and gobbling up her fodder Please get me more of your amazing medicine!

l’m coming, my pet! Chikhloo is a darling boy Brings the world so much joy! Chikhloo! Wait up! -What’s this with Kalyani? -What’s what? The secret, you crook! Secret? What’s with this sudden change of heart? You dare not hide anything from me! Are you under a spell or something? Basking in another’s glory Aren’t you? -You want to know the truth? -Speak up, will you? What did you feed her? Medicine Who gave it to you? Nobody! l’m smart! l attend all my classes Must l tell Alright… alright! He told me Say, is Kalyani dead? Cheat! You gave me medicine for poison! Saguna, the cow is eating well her tumor has subsided, puss has drained out! -All were praising us! -How do you know? My mistake! I’ll give you real poison today! l won’t hurt animals They have done nothing wrong to me! Nobody ever Said good things to me before! Strange, l must say but now Jaglya will have to shave half his moustache off! Leave me alone! The village must be dumbstruck! Gaurakka wouldn’t stop smooching me! Even gave me sweets! Here! Hmmm! Bread, sugar and Kalyani’s butter! Saalu was shocked! Kept saying, ”Don’t you dare hide anything form me!” Breathe a word about the truth, and Bhutya will vanish forever! l know! And l didn’t say a thing But Bhutya, can’t we confide in Saalu? We’ll put her under an oath to secrecy too -Who is this Saalu? -I’ve told you about her? She’s my friend She’s older than me! -My Granny always says -What? she says… Saalu is like an angel without wings Granny says… Saalu is the sweetest of all things Granny says… Saalu is pure, gentle n pretty Granny says… Saalu’s smart, wise n witty Granny says… Saalu’s hair is white as snow Granny says… Saalu’s skin has an ebony glow Sorry sorry… got all mixed up, you know! lt goes hair that wields an ebony glow my Saguna’s skin’s as fair as snow Saalu’s cooking is a godsend! Granny says, ”Wonder who’ll get her in the end!” and the breads she bakes are as round as the full-moon! Admit it! lt’s As round as the full-moon!

Stop staring and eat! Just wondering if this bread is rounder than the full moon before me! She blushes! Careful! Don’t tweak that little nose too hard For that’s where my heart lies captured! Leave me. The bread’ll char Let it char Let go. The bread’ll char Let it char… sometimes tastes better that way The bread’ll char lt’s charred! l can smell it! -At least let me toss it -Lets toss it together Bhutya… what if you and Saalu marry? What fun! I’ll get to ride on the bridal-mare with you and Saalu Buy her clothes, and she’ll bake you breads Say nice things to Each other and you’ll even have kids! Bhutya, you will marry Saalu, won’t you? Bhutya, you will marry Saalu, won’t you? Won’t you? Shall l initiate the talks, then? How many times do l have to tell you l hate mankind? You’d promised me you’ll go to school and then teach me in turn? l’m on my way but please consider my Trade winds and Seasonal winds Volume of that tank? C’mon think! The palasi pact had 25 clauses Describe the ‘atoms to molecules’ process? Keshavsoot or Keshavkumar what was Atre fondly called? Can’t connect… he has no clue Chikhloo’s brain is through and through! Saguna, gotta learn … must get wise!! Down with ignorance! Go to school, have no fear! Pretend that school is very dear! See, hear, and understand That’s the key to better ranks! Maths is a game with simple rules plus you win, minus you lose! Marbles are Circles, kites are square, Geometry’s an easy affair! History charms, with its mystical air Harappa! Mohenjodaro… its all there! Which sailor circled the Cape of Good Hope? Umm… Vasco Da Columbus? No… no, Columbus Da Gama! See? ignorance brought you shame! ignorance soiled your name! Chikhloo say, who was born at Chikhli? Tatya Tope… No? Nana Phadanavis… no? -Then… the Queen of Jhansi surely? -Fool! Nincompoop it was Lokmanya Tilak! Lokmanya Bal Gangadhar Tilak Born 1856 Died 1920 l didn’t eat the nuts l shall not clear the shells this showed his mettle! Freedom is my birthright and l SHALL ACHlEVE lT! ”The British should have their heads checked!” he said upright!

Penned ‘Geeta Rahasya’ in Mandalay Jail Founded community Ganesh Festivals! Leader of the commonest among commons! How did the lamp light in Edison’s brain? Who created vacuum in Van Der Wahl’s sphere? What was invented when James Watt saw the kettle boiling? -Steam Engine! -Excellent!! Down with ignorance! What denotes ‘Doer’? What is the function of a verb? How does the Sanskrit word Rama change? Accusative, Nominative, ‘n’ Dative Essays based on models? Easy! ABCD, small- CAPlTAL English is a cakewalk! The English language is of universal importance I’ll teach you Umm Err Bhutya!!! Humans respire, plants Photosynthesize Mirage is an optical illusion A deer runs at varying speeds How do you measure velocity? 22 up ‘n’ 7 down, and yet its called Pl! Garo, Khashi, Jaitiya is a mountain range DOWN WlTH lGNORANCE! lts great fun to be at school! Learning new things each new day! Reading, writing, thinking is so enjoyable! Show me the place where l can get more of this Bhutya… where are you taking the eagle? See the free skies in his eyes? Come, let’s set him free He’ll be gone forever? Sooner or later we all have to go our respective paths my dear! Bhutya’s home is a temporary shelter Come hear, rest a while, and move along Don’t forget us, friend! How graceful The eagle looked! Uncle Subhan Horrible guy! Despises me! What’s the matter with him? Don’t move… he’ll go Will his chickens get orphaned now? -Will he die? -Can’t say! The fangs have just grazed his skin He might just make it What are you doing? Trying to stop the blood flow by blocking the artery so the poison won’t spread to the rest of the body

Wait, let me evaluate the forest’s entrance Nothing to worry about He’ll make it Go and raise alarm. Have him taken to the village and return I’ll have the medicine ready. Now run along! Chikhloo’s an amazing boy Subhan wake up He won’t wake up Chikhloo said to keep the foot raised ls anyone tending to Subhan’s wife? Have you no sense of timing you flirt? lt’s not that really Someone in the next village can fix poison with mumbo jumbo! This is no ordinary snakebite! Subhan is doomed! That snake was Bhutya himself! Now we’ll all experience Bhutya’s wrath! Shut up! Chikhloo’ll protect us The pint-sized brat? This is no child’s play! Shut up! We don’t need negativity here! Go away! I’ll go! But mark my words Chikhloo’ll bring Doom upon all of us! We’ll see! Now get lost! How’s uncle Subhan now? -Says who? -Says he! Liar. l said nothing What are you doing? He moved… he’s alive Will he make it? 100 %! Why loosen that? lts purpose is served! Just do as he says! That’s that! Now, this paste has to be applied every two hours -Don’t forget? -NO!!!! Saalu… you? How long will you evade me? Speak up! -I’ve already told you -You’ve told me nothing! -Who’s teaching you this? -Who would teach me? That’s what l’m Asking, you pig! l just follow my heart Your heart! Do you even know where it is located? Er… l learnt it at school from the book! -Show me the book -The Teacher has borrowed it Why? Has he been bitten by a snake as well? Are you going to tell me the truth or not? There’s nothing to tell Swear on my head then! I’ll never speak with you again! -Saalu -Get Lost! You Deserting rat! Kaushalya, fetch my underwear and towel Wait, l’m coming Quick! l’m freezing! There’s a letter for you Signed by a Dr. Ganpat

Morning Shambhu! Where are you coming from? Oh, leaving some manure in the fields A new Ayurvedic Doctor is coming to our village! That’s a great piece of news! This new Doctor’s a blessing to the village! HMMM? spitting pan on my face anymore! He plans to start a factory here Our forest is rich with medicinal herbs -He’ll use them to make medicines! -But not for you You’ve lost all sense of taste He’ll also open a dispensary here People from all nearby villages will flock here! it’ll fetch money for the village! Youths will get jobs at the factory! God himself is coming to our village in the form of this doctor! But what about Bhutya? He was better off with his mouth full But what about Bhutya? lt always boils down to Bhutya? Let the doctor arrive! We’ll find a way! lf he hears of Bhutya he’ll run away! -Let’s not tell him anything! -Oh shut up! A new Exorcist has arrived in the next town, He’s known to fix many a dreaded ghost! What’s stalling us then? Get him now!!! A new Doctor is coming to the village isn’t that good news? But l want Bhutya! You know Bhutya will never come to the village -Never ever? -No! l think you should think this over Alright then. I’ll shift in here with you Bhutya… they’ve summoned an Exorcist, a ghost buster! l hear he is really powerful Bhutya?? Bhutya??? You fool am l a ghost? Then what harm can a exorcist do to me? Ghosts are nothing but a myth! Belief breeds faith, and fear breeds superstition! As fear increases, so do ghosts specters, ghouls, sprites, banshees Now tell me, how do ghosts happen? When people die! Animals, birds, insects die too! Why has no one ever seen the ghost of any animal or bird? But then what does the Exorcist do? He plays on the fears in people’s minds Darkness, shadows, weird noises, scary shapes then he visits the place in question and looks for the reason behind the fear and gets rid of it Then just for effect he chants mumbo-jumbo, pierces needles into lemons, chilies, and shouts ”Leave oh spirit or l shall destroy you!” And lo! No spirit no more! lf spirits soar into the skies, birds ought to have seen them sometime? Saguna… did you ever see a spirit? She says ‘no’! When is your Exorcist due? Stop! lt’s not safe beyond this point! BHUTYA! Your nemesis has arrived!

Maintain pin drop silence! Nobody will utter a word! Hail Goddess Bhasmavati! Now Bhutya is screwed! Who spoke? You?? Sorry sssir Protective shield No shield for you? -Now who spoke? You? -Not me… him Ssssorry… ssssir! Hail Goddess Bhasmavati! Mother Goddess, give me strength to destroy the vile Bhutya Bhutya… here l come Bhutya! Stop running like a rat! l am going to destroy you forever! Hah! BHUTYA!!! Sip some booze and smoke some pot Thrive as fear induces rot Foolish men they made me king When a little sense was all I’d got Who is it…?

Lord… shield my child from evil! Keep him happy! You’re very kind, Lord He was slipping on the wrong path but you showed him the light Let him mature just a little more then I’d willingly come to serve you! I’ve doubted you often Forgive me Look after my child, Oh Lord! Saalu… wait up! -Let go of me -What if l don’t? l slap you Please don’t sulk! Aren’t you ashamed to touch a woman in public? You’re a woman? Why didn’t you say so before? A lot has changed now l’m getting married! To whom? -Why should l tell you? -You’ll not tell me? You are the one who keeps secrets! But l’m not like you at all So I’ll tell you As it is l’m lonely in the village So l have decided to say yes to any proposal that comes my way, and I’ll leave this village forever The new doctor that’s coming to our village? Father is going to offer him my hand I’ve agreed! Hey look! Saalu’s off to the river Saalu, take us with you! -Bhutya -What? -Bhutya, come with me -Where? Where are you taking me? What if l’m spotted? Bhutya, that is Saalu What are you doing? Look! isn’t she pretty? isn’t granny right about her? Ajji says… Saalu is like an angel without wings Ajji says… Saalu is the sweetest of all things Ajji says… Saalu is pure, gentle and pretty Ajji says… Saalu’s smart, wise and witty Ajji says Girls… be careful! The water’s deep

Alka! Don’t just stand there, run to the village and get help Help! Alka is drowning in the river! What did you say? The headman’s girl? That means… my Anusuya’s girl My girl! Oh God Look! There’s Chikhloo! Chikhloo! What happened? Did she slip into the water? ls she alive? Alka! Thank God you’re safe! Chikhloo… it is only because of you that my daughter is alive l can’t thank you enough? I’ve always maintained Chikhloo is our saviour! Strange! Nobody ever heard you ! l always knew… Chikhloo is a real gem. Come Jaglya -let’s carry him to the village -Yeah! Let’s felicitate him! Wait. Put me down No! Saalu… help! Shall l carry Saalu? Three cheers for Chikhloo Hip Hip Hurray! Greetings fellow villagers! Today we bask in double joy! This evening, we felicitate our new Doctor Ganpat! But along with him, we shall also honour our very own hero! l always knew this boy is special! And you now realise it What hasn’t Chikhloo done for our village? So young, yet he bravely went into the forbidden forest And fought Bhutya single handedly! Bhutya has tormented us enough Chikhloo has smashed Bhutya into submission! lt’s only because all of you insisted that l have agreed to preside over this gathering! Bhutya took on various forms to torment us But Chikhloo and l, we fought him bravely and if he ever rears his ugly head again, we’ll wipe him off the face of the earth! Chikhloo, please assume the responsibility of escorting Doctor Ganpat to and from the forest -What do you say? -Shut up! What??? Fools… the lot of you! How dare you curse Bhutya? Bhutya isn’t evil, he’s a nice soul!

That’s right! Every good deed that l have done till date is Blurt a word about me, and Bhutya’s gone forever! l swear I’ll never tell anyone! Men will enter the forest and destroy everything Bhutya will disappear forever! Chikhloo… what did you say? Fooled you, didn’t l Er… l have to go Bhutya! Saalu Bhutya and me Here… He’s the best broke my promise he’s gone…! This is why l wasn’t telling you My friend is gone Eventually we all have to go to our respective paths! Bhutya’s home is a temporary shelter You rest here awhile, and you move on again! You should be glad that a new Doctor coming! See? l knew you’d like her! Ajji’s always right! Saalu… lt’s impossible you have achieved in a day, what I’ve been trying for two months! What? Come with me to the village… quick! My brothers and their sisters, What a special day in our lives! Mr. Ganpat Kalbhor, our new Doctor has arrived As you can see, we are in the process of welcoming him with traditional headgear, shawl, coconut and garland! And now l request him to speak Er… Chikhloo How have you two have met? (l AM BHUTYA)

A little fun! Life is beautiful… we must strive to make it even better! No more illness in this village No more fear! True to its name, Mangalpada will be HAPPY TOWN! Bhutya is gone forever! Cock-a-doodle-do!!!